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Newest Member: reconstruire

New Beginnings :
Thank you, next

Topic is Sleeping.
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 twicefooled (original poster member #42976) posted at 4:50 PM on Friday, July 17th, 2020

Last night I ended my relationship with my boyfriend of 10 months. He has some amazing qualities, but in the last few weeks we've been delving into serious talking territory and it's brought to light some big differences between us.

Old me would have forgiven the differences because of the positives. However, the differences make us fundamentally compatible for the long term. Instead of festering about it, I pulled the plug. So the new, wiser, me knows that I have a tendency to settle and I promised myself that I would never do that again.

This morning I feel like a weight has been lifted and I'm going to see where life takes me. I have 2 incredible teenagers (that I've single handedly raised the last 6 yrs), an amazing career and kick ass friends. A partner would be nice but only if he's the right one.

Growth can feel so freeing <3

May 29 2021 ***reclaimed myself and decided to delete my story with my ex because I'm now 7 years free from him and mentally healthier than I've been in years.

*********When you know better, you can do better*************

posts: 492   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014
id 8563094
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Chili ( member #35503) posted at 5:10 PM on Friday, July 17th, 2020

twicefooled! Big big huge kudos to you. It is sooooo brave to end a relationship that you know just isn't right for you. So. Brave.

Growth is absolutely freeing. (Doesn't mean it's not sometimes difficult or sad).

Good on you. What are you doing with your lightness this weekend to celebrate you?

2012 pretty much sucked.
Things no longer suck.
Took off flying solo with the co-pilot chili dog.
"Life teaches you how to live it if you live long enough" - Tony Bennett

posts: 2239   ·   registered: May. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: Reality
id 8563105
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 twicefooled (original poster member #42976) posted at 5:38 PM on Friday, July 17th, 2020

Thank you! After leaving my marriage, I find breaking up a lot less gut wrenching (although I will grieve the good parts)

This weekend is going to be about quiet reflection and Netflix :) Both of my kiddos are away tonight (Covid numbers are low here in Canada and we've been allowed "bubbles" of people to interact with) so I'm going to enjoy doing nothing for a change (I have a busy life), just me and the dog :)

May 29 2021 ***reclaimed myself and decided to delete my story with my ex because I'm now 7 years free from him and mentally healthier than I've been in years.

*********When you know better, you can do better*************

posts: 492   ·   registered: Apr. 2nd, 2014
id 8563115
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nekonamida ( member #42956) posted at 10:26 PM on Friday, July 17th, 2020

TF, be proud of yourself. This is a huge step forward. You evaded the trap that got you caught up with your XWH in the first place. This time you can't be fooled again!

posts: 5232   ·   registered: Mar. 31st, 2014   ·   location: United States
id 8563237
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Hawke ( member #47517) posted at 2:20 AM on Saturday, July 18th, 2020

Good for you, twicefooled. I've only had one breakup (last fall) since the big one. I actually found it very healing to break up honestly and directly. I still have some growing to do, though, as it was he who broke up with me, even though I'd known for some time that it wasn't working. We are actually still good friends (although I had to distance myself from him for a while to heal).

Enjoy your Netflix!

Me: BS (b. '75)
Him: exWS (b. '76)
D-Day: April 2015
Together 10 years
2 kids: 2011 and 2014
Separated (no divorce required for common law couple in my jurisdiction)

posts: 2370   ·   registered: Apr. 13th, 2015   ·   location: Alberta, Canada
id 8563308
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ZenMumWalking ( Guide #25341) posted at 9:58 PM on Saturday, July 18th, 2020

high five girl!!! ((((twicefooled))))

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 8563561
Topic is Sleeping.
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