SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

@ Bigger

your post is kind of confusing to me. The only thing I really understood. Was you talking about money somewhat and the only reason why that was brought up was because other members asked if we had joint account or if he had access to my money, which my reply was no he does not have access to my money because we have separate bank accounts.

update #1

Myself:

I have a appointment next week with a therapist.

signed myself up for a gym membership to keep

looking for remote jobs

Him:

so this is just providing a update on things that he have done and said to me.

Went to ER to do a detoxification for the Coke however, since they said, it’s been over five days since he’s done they can't do anything it’s pretty much a psychological urge, and he has to fight that himself and go to an outpatient rehab.

he’s got a job- Which I have verified

sharing his location with me

Said he's done lying, told me that he only had that one physical sexual encounter. Throughout marriage he did asking/pay for pictures.

He showed me a appointment to see a therapist next week.

Said he would take of mortgage and if I can take care of the utility bills/internet

Tell him to give you the money for the mortgage every month. Don't trust him to pay it on his own.
One thing Bigger was saying was that you can probably get an easy and inexpensive divorce. You just need to look into services that can help you with that.

Agree that you cannot trust him right now to pay the mortgage. Have him give you the money. What if he doesn’t pay the mortgage and instead buys drugs or prostitutes or cam girls? MAYBE MAYBE a long way down the road he will prove himself trust worthy. But losing your home would be catastrophic so don’t let him endanger that.

I think Bigger was pointing out that you said he didn’t use your money. But when married, it’s all marital funds so your both of your money, marital money. It doesn’t matter what account it is in. He’s using marital funds to pay for his betrayals. This can come into play if you divorce.

Also, look into legal separation. In some places you can be legally separated and that protects your finances and your credit. It’s not divorce, but offers some protection. Look for women’s shelters or advocacy groups - lawyers there may be able to help you.

@BarelyBreathing

I'll definitely do that and thank you for that breakdown. I never thought of it like that.

I'll definitely try to start on the process of a legal separation next week.