Today I met with Divorce Lawyer and I'm so upset

My SAWH relapsed with his porn addiction , which I discovered about 6 weeks ago..it had been going on for at least 6 months and several thousands of dollars wasted on this addiction.
I had my first DDay in 2017 when I learned of his affair, which was born from the porn addiction. Of course it was devastating to me and we spent a few years , and a few therapists working on both our marriage as well as IC for both of us. I really thought we turned a corner , oddly during COVID. We got closer , worked hard, etc...

I have been really struggling. I love him , but the trust is gone. He is with a new therapist , but my faith is very low for any meaningful change. We argued last week about the porn use , which he minimized ( not as bad as an actual affair , according to him )

I am also so angry at him. I just turned 62 and sure as hell don't want to be dealing with this at my age.

The meeting with the lawyer went ok, I suppose. We have a business together which we have been discussing selling. He pretty much admitted that he doesn't want to sell , it's just me pressuring him.

Well, one way or another , it will likely have to be sold if I decide to move forward with divorce. He will not have the financial ability/ means to buy me out.
It's all so complicated and messy and I am really feeling overwhelmed right now

4 comments posted: Wednesday, August 7th, 2024

Here I am again...

I was a member here starting in 2018, shortly after discovering my husband's porn addiction and affair.
After a couple of years of therapy and going thru Covid , we had made a lot of progress in our recovery , but I learned a few days ago that he has been abusing porn again for at least the last 6 months. Could be longer , but I saw what I saw and don't need to search more..6 months and $10,000 spent on it ( he was using a secret credit card and using a business account to pay for the card )

I am feeling so many emotions but the strongest one right now is anger. I am furious...I am 62 years old. I feel like he took a huge chunk of my life from me and we should be looking at a peaceful retirement...now I feel like we are looking at divorce. I just will not put up with this again

I am not the same woman I was when I initially discovered his affair. I am stronger. I grew a lot. I lost a significant amount of weight , stopped drinking and just made a lot of positive changes to my health..but divorce was not on my BINGO card as I inch closer to retirement.
He will be starting with a new therapist starting next week , but my hopes are low for him to remain sober and faithful

27 comments posted: Wednesday, June 26th, 2024

Questions about Whatsapp

I am not familiar with this. My WH gave me some half ass answers when I caught him using it to communicate with a woman in a questionable way.

1) Do photos sent between contacts disappear like they do with Snapchat ?

2) Do contacts with other apps and email accounts become automatically synced ?

I am in a tough spot here and not sure what / who to believe

2 comments posted: Sunday, November 25th, 2018