Finally done and at peace with it

Hi All,
I allowed four rounds of "her" before I finally said it was over and meant it. I have been at peace and things are going smoothly thus far. He knows this is all his fault and is currently very "giving" in terms of settlements. I feel like I need to rush the divorce while he is being remorseful and kind because it’s only a matter of time before he starts the blaming me bullcrap again. Has anyone ever thought it (the divorce) was going to be easy and simple but then the guilty party turned on you and made things complicated?
Ugh I just want this done and to move on with my life. I can only shed so many tears over one person.

4 comments posted: Monday, January 16th, 2023

Do I stay or go?

I found out in September that my husband was having an affair. When I found out, he was remorseful, and willing to do all the things to make us work. He started individual therapy, we started couples therapy. He was reading the books, doing all the things, answering all of my questions. For about three weeks. Then he got frustrated with having to tell me what he was doing all the time and completely checked out. I found out a week later he started back up with her. I kicked him out of the house that night. That was about a month ago. We have two children. It is sometimes like pulling teeth to get him to be open and honest with me. Some days he tells me he wants to do whatever it will take but doesn’t know if he can and doesn’t want to hurt me more. He supposedly completely ended things with her last week because he wants to try to make us work. But I’m just not sure he has it in him and he is also not sure he can do it. How do I know how long to wait for him to figure out if he’s up for this or not? My life is a roller coaster. I can’t commit to any plans because I have no idea where I’m going to be on that roller coaster that day. I hate living in this limbo and I hate that he did this to us. Does anyone have any advice for deciding when to call it?

12 comments posted: Tuesday, December 6th, 2022