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Newest Member: Betrayed1000XBy1

The Book Club :
any affair fiction books

Topic is Sleeping.
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 philly172 (original poster member #19024) posted at 10:40 PM on Wednesday, December 10th, 2008

I need a good read.. an empowering read.. I'm looking for a fiction book that deals with infidelity & the BW getting even, getting over etc.. Is there such a book?

"Sorry" works when a mistake is made, but not when trust is broken. So in life, make mistakes, but never break trust. Because forgiving is easy, but forgetting & trusting again is sometimes impossible

posts: 4874   ·   registered: Apr. 7th, 2008   ·   location: Not in Philly.. it's just a screen name :-)
id 3466820
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cantlivewithouth ( member #11939) posted at 1:29 AM on Thursday, December 11th, 2008

I just read one called Fourplay. It's really good. If you want you can PM me your address and I'll send it to you. I just put it up on paperbackswap.com so I'm looking to share it with the next person.

Married a truly wonderful and loving man Sept. 19, 2010. Not only survived, but thrived.

My new mantra: Argue Your Limitations.‎

posts: 40994   ·   registered: Sep. 5th, 2006   ·   location: Canada by way of Virginia
id 3467124
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wifehad5 ( Administrator #15162) posted at 2:26 AM on Thursday, December 11th, 2008

I've just read the second of two really good books by one of my favorite authors that deal with infidelity. The first I read before I knew I was a BH. The moral issues kept me up for nights

The followup is new, and deals with the couple getting back together after 10 years apart.

The author is Nelson Demille. The first book is The Gold Coast, and the followup is The Gate House.

The first one isn't very empowering, but by the end of the second, the good guy comes out ahead

FBH - 52 FWW - 53 (BrokenRoad)2 kids 17 & 22The people you do your life with shape the life you live

posts: 55856   ·   registered: Jun. 28th, 2007   ·   location: Michigan
id 3467238
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Soldiersgirl ( member #8188) posted at 9:15 AM on Thursday, December 11th, 2008

I just read a really amazing one called My Husbands Sweethearts. I cried through a big part of it.

You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it. ~ Henny Youngman
No man was ever shot by his wife while doing the dishes. ~ Anon
It takes two to make a marriage a success and only one to make it a failure. ~ Herbert Samuel

posts: 1375   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2005   ·   location: Louisiana
id 3467764
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janeway ( member #21540) posted at 1:44 PM on Thursday, December 11th, 2008

I think Revenge of a/the Middle Aged Woman -- it came out +/- ten years ago? Not too intense, but thoughtful, and hilarious at points.

Let us know if you find a good one!

posts: 282   ·   registered: Nov. 6th, 2008
id 3467951
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scared&stronger ( member #15942) posted at 3:17 PM on Thursday, December 11th, 2008

Anything by Olivia Goldsmith. She even has one with a little voodoo involved.

WS 45
BS 43

Met when we were 17 and 15. Together since 1983, married since 1985. Two kids, B21, G15.

d-day 4-3-07

Life has a way of making us get our panties in a wad.....I refuse to wear panties ever again.



posts: 4060   ·   registered: Aug. 27th, 2007
id 3468120
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nimbyone ( member #13593) posted at 6:38 PM on Thursday, December 11th, 2008

I loved "A Ship Made of Paper" -- it isn't empowering so much as a great case against an affair. Compelling.

posts: 402   ·   registered: Feb. 8th, 2007
id 3468693
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April101 ( member #20417) posted at 1:39 AM on Thursday, January 1st, 2009

I'm currently reading 'Quickie' by James Patterson. It's not exactly an empowering book but more of a bizarre tale of Affair regret. In this case the woman has a 'revenge' affair and her husband murders the OM and it turns out the OM was married with 3 kids which the woman didn't know. Really fast paced read, but I haven't finished the book yet, so don't give away the ending anybody.

Me: 49 (BS)
Him: 47 (WS)
PA: 2 yrs
Married 22 yrs
3 kids
D Day: April 2008
Me: "Nobody wants to be with a cheater not even a cheater."
My D(16): 'Why should I listen to dad, he knew what he was doing was wrong and did it anyway'

posts: 486   ·   registered: Jul. 27th, 2008   ·   location: New York
id 3509278
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roadlesstraveled ( member #13501) posted at 5:00 AM on Thursday, January 1st, 2009

Try the book "Black Olives" by Martha Tod Dudman. It's a quick read but very well-written. I read a ton of books (both fiction and non-fiction) after my xh affair, but this book helped me the most. It really goes through all the emotions that we (as BS's) experience.

"Life is what happens when your plans go astray."

posts: 617   ·   registered: Jan. 31st, 2007
id 3509821
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layla22 ( member #19765) posted at 12:08 AM on Friday, January 2nd, 2009

I loved Quickie.

Olivia Goldsmith wrote First Wives Club, which is actually a pretty good funny movie too (catch Sarah Jessica Parker as the young ho!)

Silence is golden and duct tape is silver (courtesy of my 13 year old son)

posts: 1740   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2008   ·   location: somewhere out there
id 3511110
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April101 ( member #20417) posted at 3:37 AM on Friday, January 9th, 2009

I just finished 'Switcheroo' by Olivia Goldsmith. Excellent book. I laughed, and laughed, and laughed! Yes, it did have to do with infidelity, yet it really was very humerous. Alot of triggering, but so well written. So many of the feelings conveyed in this book I said to myself 'yup, that was us'. Yet, it really a good read. I'm a romantic at heart and found it really sad to read romance novels after my H's A. This one, however, I really enjoyed. Now, I'm going to try to find other books by this author. I have never read her books before.

Me: 49 (BS)
Him: 47 (WS)
PA: 2 yrs
Married 22 yrs
3 kids
D Day: April 2008
Me: "Nobody wants to be with a cheater not even a cheater."
My D(16): 'Why should I listen to dad, he knew what he was doing was wrong and did it anyway'

posts: 486   ·   registered: Jul. 27th, 2008   ·   location: New York
id 3529232
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jean ( member #6387) posted at 6:35 AM on Saturday, January 17th, 2009

Try "The Politicians Wife" written by "Paula Milne".

Also made into a very good TV serial.

Although British, I believe it is being made into an an American version , starring "Felicity Huffman".

It will "hit the spot" it meets your criteria

posts: 5928   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2005   ·   location: England
id 3552273
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healingheart ( member #16477) posted at 2:00 PM on Monday, January 19th, 2009

Im reading "Lessons In heartbreak" by Cathy Kelly at the moment.Im only halfway through but its a quick read, explores infidelity through both eyes (one Irish girl having an affair with a married man whilst working in New York, one Irish woman whose husband has an affair with her best friend and the two women cross)

Its definatly about affairs and infidelity and how it affects all parties but I dont know how it ends yet,I think it will be empowering by the way its written so far.



posts: 676   ·   registered: Oct. 4th, 2007   ·   location: UK
id 3556352
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sadnews ( member #22235) posted at 3:43 PM on Monday, January 19th, 2009

During the time when my WH was actively having an A (and I was still in denial, trusting that he'd "never do something like that"), I read a book called "Outtakes from a Marriage" by Ann Leary.

The book is a fictional account, written in the first person, of a wife's discovery of her husband's infidelity. Needless to say, I regularly had anxiety attacks while reading this book, because it hit so close to home.

Ann Leary is the wife of comedian Denis Leary, and she's a very funny, insightful author. I enjoyed the book, despite the subject matter.

I recommend the book, but I warn that it might be a very painful read for most BS.

Edited because I got the name of the book wrong!

[This message edited by sadnews at 12:41 PM, January 20th (Tuesday)]

posts: 731   ·   registered: Dec. 31st, 2008   ·   location: USA
id 3556642
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broken11 ( member #23277) posted at 6:39 PM on Sunday, April 12th, 2009

I really enjoyed Straight up and Dirty by Stephanie Klein. It's a memoir about her life after discovering her husband's affair.

http://www.amazon.com/Straight-Up-Dirty-Stephanie-Klein/dp/B000OFOUKW/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1239557872&sr=8-1

[This message edited by broken11 at 12:40 PM, April 12th (Sunday)]

Me: BW 30
WH:30
D-day #2 2/26/09
Filed for the big D

posts: 619   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2009
id 3761768
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hurtinginseattle ( member #21254) posted at 11:43 PM on Sunday, April 12th, 2009

Thanks for the tip about "Straight Up and Dirty", it's on my hold list at the library effective now.

"Happiness Sold Separately" was a little light but then that was exactly what I could handle at the time.

Also, "Happens Every Day" is non-fiction that I'm waiting for. Not sure how empowering it's going to be.

[This message edited by hurtinginseattle at 5:50 PM, April 12th (Sunday)]


me: BGF
together 3 years w/WBF
D-Day 9/4/08
12/5/08 WBF went NC, etc.
1/26/09 NC broken
1/27/09 sent NC letter
In R...

posts: 253   ·   registered: Oct. 14th, 2008   ·   location: Seattle
id 3762043
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broken11 ( member #23277) posted at 5:14 PM on Monday, April 13th, 2009

Glad you put it on hold. She also wrote a memoir called Moose about her times in fat camp. That was a good read too.

Thanks for the other recommendations. I'm going to the library this afternoon to see what Olivia Goldsmith books they have.

Me: BW 30
WH:30
D-day #2 2/26/09
Filed for the big D

posts: 619   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2009
id 3763359
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broken11 ( member #23277) posted at 12:41 PM on Wednesday, April 15th, 2009

another one i enjoyed was Watermelon, by Marian Keys. It's a chick lit book about a woman whose H leaves her for another woman right she gives birth to her baby. Even though the topic is tough one it's a light hearted read.

http://www.amazon.com/Watermelon-Marian-Keyes/dp/0060090367/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1239795295&sr=1-1

Me: BW 30
WH:30
D-day #2 2/26/09
Filed for the big D

posts: 619   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2009
id 3767989
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hurtbs ( member #10866) posted at 3:26 AM on Friday, April 17th, 2009

Under the Tuscan Sun

Very lifetime movie-y - it's about a woman whose Husband has a midlife crisis, leaves her for a *much* younger woman, she buys a villa in Tuscany, regains her power, etc.

Not so unique, very predictable, but 'feel good-y'

Me - 40 something. WXH DDay 2006, Divorced 2012
WBF DDay #1 9/2022 #2 11/2022
Single

posts: 15762   ·   registered: Jun. 1st, 2006   ·   location: So Cal
id 3773468
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gemini_june_20 ( member #18606) posted at 4:27 AM on Friday, April 17th, 2009

There is a Lifetime movie that I LOVE. I know it is not a book. And it might even be based on a true story? This woman helps her close friend investigate/spy on the friends WH. She buys equipment, does research and takes photos of her friends' WH with the OW. She thinks her own marriage is safe. Then she starts to suspect her own H. She employs the same PI techniques all herself and gets a video of her WH and an OW in a hotel room. She sets it up so that when her WH comes home, he walks into his house where the video is playing. SHe goes on to divorce him and starts her own PI practice, becomes very successful delivering conferences to help others. She took a negative situation and turned it into a positive by moving on and building her own life and business. I loved it! (And secretly I've always wanted to beceome a PI!)

Married >7 years, together ~9 years
Discovered affair - March 11, 2003
Filed for divorce - March 31, 2003
Divorced - May 5, 2003 (waived 90 day waiting period)
New Job - May 12, 2003
Bought Own Home - May 6, 2003
Adopted a baby girl!-August 2006

posts: 1259   ·   registered: Mar. 13th, 2008   ·   location: Oregon
id 3773630
Topic is Sleeping.
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