subtitled Living in the Aftermath of Tragedy
by Sue Klebold
This book was written by the mother of one of the Columbine shooters, 17 years later.
I was enrapt by it---read it cover-to-cover in 2 days.
In it she talks about her experience during (and before and after) the crisis, as well as her memories of her son Dylan. They seemed to have a normal suburban life, and he seemed to be a normal American teenager.
Her honesty is absolutely amazing---her descent into horror and grief, her constant questioning of herself, why didn't she see something amiss, etc. It touched me in so many places....I was reminded of my own horror and grief/PTSD surrounding my divorce. It shows how the life we lead can be pure illusion, and the reactions that occur when we realize reality (that happened to me, with other details obviously). As the mother of 2 teenage boys, it also alarmed me into not being so dismissive of little signs that things can be amiss. I felt not so alone in my own descent into hell---we are all tied together in grief reactions. And I realized that if someone doesn't want you to know them, or to hide things from you, they will, period, despite vigilance (this also helped me with processing my own situation--there is some reassurance in that, oddly enough). She admirably avoided blame (except of herself, in her constant questioning--as if she could have changed the outcome). And she cites lots of experts and studies about teen suicide, and the factors that can lead to tragedy.
Can't recommend this book highly enough! It really touched me. I have so much compassion for her. And admiration for her courage.