Since my STBXW abdicated her throne and walked out of our (me, three kids at home, one out on her own) family, I have not tried to re-engage, especially since I am STILL legally and in the eyes of God, married. Yes, I went on two "DATES" with two separate people that were more like chat fests. I focused more on the three kids she left, two of which (now 15 and 25) still live with me. That I didn't (OR COULDN'T) file until this past August kind of put me in an on-hold position.
But, there's sill clouds on the horizon, despite the impending divorce resolution.
Shortly after she left me in 2016 I found I had cancer. Hours of testing, scoping, radiation and meds and it's in remission. But it left scars, ones guys don't really care to talk about (them blue thingys didn't work for me). Which means at my age (6 1/2 bells) I don't know if I care to or want to date once this is over. Maybe just get my youngest through HS and my other "launched" and then find a quiet little rental somewhere, retire, and then just read the rest of my life away.
No, these past 20 years (since before she left) have not been easy. She had SIX affairs (she' living with her last one, a still-married man with whom they celebrated Xmas WITH his still-wife and kids, geez), the cancer, my mom dying in 2015, one of our kids killed in 2016, losing our former family home in 2019 to foreclosure, and those are the highlights! lol. Anyway (Yes, I've been to counseling and it helped), I'm still working, keeping house, raising my kids, yadda, yadda, yadda. Just waiting for this marriage to legally be over but not so I can re-engage with someone else. My feeling is that after this, it's just a solo trip.