I was loving my IC initially, but I don't really know wtf we're doing. I guess I should ask. Mostly I update her on my week. I've tried sharing the historic issues this is bringing up for me, but she doesn't follow up with questions or meaningful feedback. Maybe she's assessed me as in triage right now - not time to dig deep. She's a CSA and a psychologist, so I trust she knows what she's doing but I often feel like I'm not getting a lot out of the sessions other than her insights into SA and encouragement to stay NC.
I'm no expert on this at all but I have to wonder if she's so focused on the SA part that she's not seeing the PTSD and trauma. And if that's the case, she's doing things in the wrong order because feedback and guidance might make all the difference for you right now. My counselor is sort of New Age-y and I just love her - she hones right in on what I'm feeling before I can identify it myself most of the time. And she always has a parable or an article for me to read or a mental exercise to do, etc.
My first counselor taught me how the amygdala works and that was a huge help to me. And then she taught me how to breathe properly. She was what I needed at the time. But once I got the panic under control, I outgrew her because she moved on to helping me organize my life and I still needed to be told I wasn't a horrible person who brought this shitshow upon myself. I've been super disorganized since my life blew up and was complaining about it to her when she suggested I make a list. There are so many lists on m kitchen counter and table, I have lists to keep track of my lists. So I knew then that I needed something different.
So trust your gut and if you don't get good answers from her, maybe it's time to move on to a new counselor.
Alternatively, if any of the 12 Step programs would be applicable in your situation, I highly recommend it. They're all different, of course, but the basic premise is the same with all of them,they're all ways to find peace and serenity. And the friendship and camaraderie of being with people who understand how you feel and have worked their way through it is, IMHO, the best thing ever. Sort of like having S.I. in person.
2 - 5 years is just the way it is. I started off gung ho and was going to do the Advanced Placement version because being as old as I was, 5 years might be all I had left. But I'm here to tell you, you can't hurry love, The Supremes were right.
(2-5 years to heal isn't necessarily 2-5 years of feeling horrible and unhappy. Try to envision it as your time for you. This is your time to get to know yourself and make your good points better and start healthy sleeping and eating habits, etc. So that your life after rebirth is fantastic and wonderful in every way.)
BW, was 67; now 74; M 45 yrs., T 49 yrs.DDay#1, 1982; DDay#2, May, 2017. D July, 2017