PleaseBeFixable
consider FWIW
when I was served the Merde Panini - I found myself desperate for a "magic" pill to stop the agony, the emptiness, the loss of the will to live - etc.
I looked at tens of or a hundred web postings/site. Found many affair/cheater sites - including some that "celebrated" cheating. Check out Ashley Madison. There are a LOT of people on the planet who are only looking out for themself even when they have VOWED themself to another. 
I soon (within a month) found many sites requesting $$$ for their offerings to get you out of your despair.
Some of them very off-putting. One site suggested the "husband" put up with wife wandering & getting poked by a paramour for A YEAR. !!! I was aghast when I read that one.
After registering on many sites and getting lots of email 'suggesting' their offerings (for $$?? amounts) would be my salvation, remained skeptical and spent $$ on books to read.
As I am a bit of a skeptical person and learned a LONG time ago - sometimes a problem or situation takes a lot of time with a lot of work to sort out.
So it is for learning to live with with the crap-sandwich staring at you on your plate. (life)
There are no MAGIC bullets. There is no "course" that will absolve your pain.
Instead:
Read all the offerings on this site in the library.
Start posting - there are many who rarely post who may see your request for help and offer suggestions - which are free - that will help. Many current posters are from both sides of the cheating scene and offer their experiences. Read all you can - it will help gel your thoughts.
One item in particular is just a tough one - time. Time will pass and your brain will learn to accept what has happened to you.
Suggest you look for Psychology oriented sites that quantify (by studies) the mental work of talking about your problem to others. Others being - someone you can trust and/or a paid counselor. (aka IC)
Check out books to read. Local library likely to have many. Consider the book: "Cheating in a Nutshell" - not to $$ and gives a lot of info on how others dealt with their adversity.
Add: "Not Just Friends - ", "How to Help Your Spouse Heal From Your Affair" - religious oriented but will help you formulate what a reformed (or on the way to that) cheater should look like.
Do not expect life to improve quickly - emotional recovery of the magnitude brought about by an affair is a very long process.
For the Cheatee - it is a life sentence. You will never forget. As time passes, you will not think about it all the time. Eventually you may even go days without the memory popping into your conscience. Given enough time - if you split you will recover your sanity sooner. (Explore the NO CONTACT process) - if you work to stay together - it will be years - some take a few to get at peace with their minds. Some, (sadly?) never get peace and years later divorce. One doesn't know till the fork in the path of life appears before them.
Summary? Give your self time and husband your $$$ - there are NO quick fixes in affair recovery.
Try re-posting your entire story with all the details - or just start a journal and write down everything and leave some spaces between paragraphs and/or pages - with time you will remember some things you forget and also your thinking about what has happened will morph into something a bit different. Reading what you wrote much later will help you heal.
Side note: There is a site called "TEMU" (not real sure about that) and the site lists all kinds of blank books/notebooks/journals and not very much $$.
A bit about me - I looked at the sum of what a future would/could be and decided to gamble - I bought a leather bound Journal constructed like what would maybe look like a journal from several 100 years ago - unlined pages, heavy leather binding. I wrote my thoughts in it and left on dining room table for "her" to read - and write also. We did this for some time and it helped us to find common ground on which to walk forward. It was 10 years ago - we are better now. - the memory is still in my brain.
Sites with the stories of others who had to walk this path, like this one, saved my sanity. Knowing others got the shaft but carried on and the writing of their travails helped me find sanity.
Give a try and don't be quick to try $$$ your way out of despair.
"May a warm wind fill your sail and and with a following sea" 
I'm posting this as a "post to the betrayed" as you need to see both sides of what life going forward will be like.
Most everything I've mentioned is also appropriage for the "betrayer."
[This message edited by Hippo16 at 5:19 PM, Saturday, April 20th]
